Why in the name of the Almighty have clothing designers not realized by now that women have tits? Darts help but we need you to go a step further. We’re bigger in front than men and our shirts and blouses have to be designed to accommodate the extra real estate. In fact, most North American women have more bulk everywhere than the sizing standards used by Asian manufacturers.

As I buttoned up a lovely Eileen Fisher black-and-white gingham linen blouse today, I found myself yanking the fabric forward in a vain attempt to close the gap that inevitably opens between the second and third buttons—and I am not overly endowed in that department. How do my curvaceous baby boomer friends ever cope? I suppose that’s why they stick with sweaters and knits that do not button in the front.

“Buy a larger size,” you may say, but that doesn’t always work. Getting the right circumference in a poorly designed blouse or shirt often means the back ends up being proportionately too loose, the shoulders are more suited to a linebacker, or the sides are too baggy. Then, there’s the modesty issue. While I like my shirts firmly buttoned mid-chest, I also do not want to be buttoned up to the neck in nun-like proportions. I want to be able to open the neckline far enough to allow some air flow and perhaps expose enough skin to wear a statement necklace, but not so far that the girls are on display for everyone to see.

I doubt I’m the only woman who finds blouse designs to be lacking. What they’re lacking specifically is enough buttons. A gap of three and a half inches between buttons is inadequate. Something along the lines of two-inch spans at a minimum would be infinitely more practical and give us the flexibility to adjust the top button to a personally-appropriate position, while also ensuring that the gap is sufficiently closed. It’s not that complicated, people. Add more buttons!  I’d happily pay an extra dollar or two for the addition.

Fashion has answered our call for comfort and practicality with many accommodations in clothing. We can’t thank them enough for Spandex and elastic waists. Thanks to stretch, we no longer feel like we’re being circumcised when we sit down in our jeans. Cap sleeves and short sleeves have been a blessing for those of us with bat-wing upper arms. Three-quarter sleeves are a gift from heaven. They keep us warm enough, but also accommodate the wearing of bracelets and a watch. Yes, I’m one of those last holdouts who still wear an old-fashioned timepiece on my wrist instead of relying on my smartphone. I’m a huge fan of no-iron, breathable, waffle-cotton blouses in gorgeous, vivid colours, and I wear them often. Boomer gals remember sweating through our working days in crimplene and polyester dresses and suits that treated us to an involuntary sauna. Ick!

Now that stilettos are passée, and we no longer have to dress for success, there are many wonderful options for comfortable shoes. I only wish all shoe manufacturers would include arch supports so I don’t have to buy them separately. Since retiring, I’ve accumulated an embarrassing number of comfortable sneakers, sandals, and dress shoes that I can actually still walk in. Someone heard our collective whining and responded.

My latest plea is to the manufacturers and designers of women’s blouses and shirts. We do not all have firm, long, boyish bodies. Please mind the gap when you’re adding those buttons and throw in a couple of extras for good measure. Our entire gender will appreciate it. Think of it as your contribution to a more attractive and peaceful world.