I’ve always maintained that if women ran the world there would be no war. I cannot imagine a woman possessing the surge of testosterone required to push the button that brought down the airliner over the Ukraine or firing missiles at our neighbours. We would never send our husbands, sons, brothers and lovers off to kill other people to gain a bit of dirt. We’d put the kettle on and solve our differences over a nice cup of tea and plate of brownies. That premise got me thinking about what else would be different in the world if it were run by women. Here are a few possibilities to contemplate:
- Governments would have balanced budgets and would be relatively debt-free, allowing for a minor misstep whenever summer shoes go on sale early. Federal budgets aren’t that different in principle from personal budgets. We wouldn’t need all those war toys to demonstrate how big our balls are. That money could be put to much better use for such things as daycare, healthcare and improved assistance for the truly poor.
- All males would be required to pee sitting down. Enough said.
- There would be no tailgating on the highways. Accidents would be greatly reduced with less speeding, lane-hopping and road-racing. Imagine how that would impact the insurance industry.
- Fighting in hockey would be strictly forbidden. It would return to being a game of skill and endurance.
- Those evil-minded Wall Street bankers would now be doing hard time and making restitution. Those who are left would have salaries and benefits capped, be required to do community service—and report to women.
- Health care for everyone in the United States and other countries around the world would be a right not a privilege enjoyed by the rich few.
- Low-heeled comfortable shoes would be considered objects of beauty.
- Useless calories and fat would be legislated out of all foods.
- Weight and waist-line issues would be a thing of the past (see Item 8 above).
- Older, mature women would be the most respected and revered members of our society for their wisdom, experience and inner beauty.
- Wine, chocolate and bread would be declared health foods and would have no adverse effects.
- Adult children would leave home at the age of 18 and stay gone, forever, be financially independent and live happily ever after.
- Affordable, convenient, quality daycare would be easily available for all parents.
- All electronic equipment such as computers, tablets, Smart Phones, cable and satellite remote controls would be simple to use even for beginners, be voice activated and do exactly what we want them to do, without complications, errors, breakdowns and tantrums.
- That unfortunate thing that happens to all women around the age of 48-50 would never transpire. We’d remain eternally wrinkle-free, slim, fit and dewey moist in all the right places, forever.
The possibilities are endless and intriguing. Imagine a world without wars, without borders (and the attendant customs duties), a world that is kind and nurturing, wise and wonderful. Many ancient societies were matriarchal including the early Egyptians and most indigenous people. Let’s start by replacing Vladimir Putin with Elizabeth Warren as President of Russia.
John Lennon got it so right in his beautiful song, “Imagine”. Bette Midler echoed it in “From a Distance“. There would be no hunger. There would be no child abuse, no rape, no oppression of individuals due to gender, faith, economic status or nationality. Just imagine. . .